Looking through a Frosted Mirror.

If you were to ask what life has been like the last 7 months and ten days, I'd have to use a stupid metaphor. The day Adam was born someone poured syrup over us. I feel sticky and hazy ... I can't be budged out of my optimism... I'm not euphoric, but I am having trouble seeing things without a sugar coating.

But to use another ridiculous metaphor, I've been pushed to a really high place. I'm better at my job because the little things won't push me down. My marriage is healthier. I sleep easier when I think of the things I've done for the day. I've made it this far; damn anyone, or myself, for attempting to ruin what I'm doing.

On the other hand, the top of the hill is scary because you can see how far you can fall. I wake up daily knowing how precious life is and the importance of expressing it.

This is not a sappy way of saying that having a child changed my life. This is how I feel... how I responded, what goggles I'm wearing now. I'm not blinded to real life, only seeing what I currently have in front of me.

At any second something could push me off this syrup-coated hill. But I have my feet dug into the ground more firmly.

I guess I see so much of myself in Adam... and since I love him so unconditionally, I'm not so hard on myself anymore.

He brought wisdom into my life.