How?

People ask me how I have three kids, one barely three and twin 11 moth olds, while my husband and I work full time jobs.

There are ways:
Kind co-workers, leadership, and a company who understands that family comes first.
An excellent family support system.
A positive attitude.
I don't watch TV. And when I do, it's a complete waste of my time.
And the main thing: Love.

I don't know what's going on in the world right now. I have opinions about politics, but the environment that I'm gaining knowledge from social media that is uninformed and incredulous, and when you participate you end up losing friends. So I know little, and participate less, until someone needs help.

My hair hasn't been highlighted or cut in over 9 months. And I deal with it. My nails are horrendous. My own health is shady, due to the small doses of redbull and the lack of time I have to exercise, minus two hous of soccer each Sunday (if I'm lucky).

Our house is not immaculate. Not in that the laundry is not always done or that the floors are not mopped everyday, but the house is not immaculate in that the paint is chipping from the doors from toys and laundry baskets scratching along the walls. The patio furniture is torn. The carpet is covered in irreparable stains, the tiny corners of the house are not wiped clean or sprayed down with Lysol and there are toys everywhere.

I read "encouraging" quotes on social media that tell me that my kids don't care if my house is clean and they just want my time, so cleaning is unnecessary...but whenever I read that I want to ask if it matters to them if they scream at me for a clean sippy cup of milk while I dig and scrub clean cups out if the sink. Or if they have forgotten what it's like to have a 10 month old crawling on dirty tile floors.

I quit the "Mother of Multiples" group in our area because when I told them that I had a 20 month old, planned to work, planned to breast feed and was expecting twins, they couldn't find me a "buddy." And not in the, "we are excited for you but can't find you a buddy, but stick with us..." kind of way, but in the, "ohhh... We'll get back to you," kind of way. And then all the support I could get was a place to sell our used twin gear.

I expect not to get any sleep, and that's okay.

I am okay with pacifiers and bribing with candies for good behavior, and that's okay.

I ignore purists, people who criticize modern medicine, and those who believe that full time breast feeding until their kids are walking is the only way to raise a child. I wanted to breast feed until at least 6 months, I tried, cried, and bled until i almost worked myself into a frenzy and then realized... It's okay. But I did it it for 4 months to give them everything I had.

I let them be little. LET THEM BE LITTLE.

I put myself in their place.

I know I'm not perfect, and that's okay.

I laugh when I feel like crying... Especially when I feel like crying.

And in the end, I am given great rewards, despite the sickness, the accidents, the dirty diapers and doctor's appointments, the throw up, the screaming, the daycare drop offs and the frequent declines to go out with adult friends... I am given more than I ever could have imagined.

And never once, ever, did I wish this had never happened to me. It's not "survival," it's life. I don't waste it wondering how it could have been "easier."